first christmas all by myself

As i'm walking through days, try to forward it (but yes, i can't of course)by closing my eyes and let the time flies.

This is my first christmas being alone.

My very first white christmas. And i have nobody to share with.

I used to spent my christmas (eve and day) with my family and closest friends. BUt the new year (eve or day) usually with a lot of people that mostly i don't know.

But christmas...It should be with people you loves. Your family, your best friends ever, or maybe your suppose.

When i was at school, i always spent my christmas only with my family. My grandma's cooked, my aunt's cake, my mom's blackforest, my aunt's pudding and cookies, and all my relative either from my mom side or my dad side.

But then after i reach 19 and i was in university, i started to do it with my friends also. Usually with Agung's mom and sister. Agung is my best friend from university. And also Dharu, our best friend also, Ekky (agung's cousin) and rezal (ekky's best friend). Going around the city, spread the love with feeding the poor (christmas style of agung's family). That's christmas in 2004, and also in 2005. When Agung and Dharu actually already move to switzerland to do their hotelism bachelor degree in Montreaux.

In 2006, after Dharu died, and Agung dissapear, we still doing it. Keep the habits by joining Agung's mom and sister (we, as in Ekky, Rezal and i). Never thought that it would be our last time.

Coz on 2007, Ekky and Rezal got an accident and passed away. Both of them. yeah, i remember that in that time, i feel like i'm the most lonely person in the world and, how i feel more horrible by seeing that my one by one, my friends left me. Or i did. I don't know. But in 2007, i made a new friends, and we spent christmas together. Agus. Well, not only him, but also a bunch of other friends, but he's the best. After all the things i made his time so hard to be my friend, but he stayed. That was the most thankful thing i ever had, i think.

2008, it's a very funny christmas, coz i spent it with Mario, my new friends who we were so closed each other i don't know why =p. The thing that i remember, the one that started our friendship is just after i gave him the learn russian software. I bought it for him coz i know he wants to learn russian. The 2008 christmas is the most funny one coz we were tuck in mall teasing girls who flirted rich guy and also good looking guy, hahaha. Can't forget it even a piece =p;

And now, i am all alone.

Missing all my family and friends. Grandma, dad, mom, all my brother : sammy, ian, reva, paulus, my aunts (lina and butet), and all my best friends : agus, mariana,mario, reyhan, vano, ferdinant, yenni, inneke, nina, even bumbu...yes, i miss you too 'mbu...

But maybe i just have to learn. There will be always the first time. I pass, the first birthday without dharu, first christmas without dharu, first of everything without him, and then all the first thing without ekky dan rezal, and by the time vano went out of the country, i'm kind of used to it.

I know that GOd never leave my all by myself. He always gave me the new 'guardian angel'for me. And i know he definately send me one here also. I just has to find out who. And spend more time with my new guardian angel.

God, please make me stay positive...

ngga mau di post disana, jadinya disini deh

Mungkin bener pertanyaannya Youri,`why do you always makes a hundred things to make me less like you ?". Beberapa lama yang lalu, gw merasa itu pertanyaan aneh, gw merasa kalau gw ngga pernah membuat dia less likes me, gw malah merasa membuat dia gimana caranya supaya dia penasaran dan suka terus sama gw.

Tapi bahkan, apa yang gw percayai sedang gw lakukan pun ternyata bisa salah.

Ternyata lebih benar dugaan Youri, kalau gw malah sedang membuat dia less likes me.

Mungkin seumur hidup gw, gw ngga akan berhenti melakukan ini. Mungkin gw akan selalu melakukan ini. Mungkin seumur hidup gw, gw ngga pernah bisa, dan ngga akan pernah bisa, get over Dharu. Meski beberapa saat yang lalu, gw terdampar di pinggir pantai, merasa kalau gw sedang duduk disana, bertemu Dharu.

I scream so loud asking him to let me go. But then, as i sat on the sands, hardly to breathe, i realized that is not Dharu, who doesn't let go of me. Coz he's not here anymore, and wont be here, ever again. I am the one who wont let go of him. I'm the one who holding his arm tightly. He just there, like usual, not trying to let go of me, but just waiting for me until i'm ready to release him.

Mungkin itu sebabnya kenapa gw hampir selalu bikin kasus2 kecil, yang mungkin, scared Youri. coz i don't believe his words, when he told me that he won't give up on me easily. Coz even my best friend ever, the person who i thought won't ever leave me, the person who i thought will stand beside me for like, forever, she give up on me. Why wouldn't him ?

Mungkin, ngga akan pernah ada orang terakhir dalam hidup gw, yang akan menemani gw ngabisin masa hidup gw. Mungkin, selamanya gw hanya akan terjebak dalam hubungan dimana keseriusan dalam pacaran adalah nomer 348923.

Karena jauh di dalam hati gw, gw akan selalu merasa mengkhianati Dharu, tiap kali gw merasa mau serius sama orang.

Till when, you're going to live like this, Fransisca ?

BEING PATHETIC, ONLY FOR A DAY

I missed you guys, really really missed you guys.

Tiap hari, gw selalu berharap akan seandainya gw bisa punya satu hari lagi with you guys. Satu hari aja, cuman satu hari aja.

Gw tau, ini udah bukan waktunya gw sedih atau menyesal lagi. Coz this is so yesterday for everyone, even for me.

Tapi apakah salah, klo gw kangen with you two ?

Apakah salah, kalau sesekali, penyesalan itu masih ada ?

Apakah salah, kalau gw merindukan persahabatan kita ?

Gw tau itu semua ngga salah. Itu sebabnya gw begitu.

Gw tau kalau selalu ada momennya, dimana kita memang ngga bisa ngelupain orang-orang yang penting buat kita.

And you know what ? Maybe it is, need a lifetime to forget you two. Not after what we’ve been through together.

Coz best friends are indeed forever, no matter what just happened, it will just stay best friends.

Forever.

“ Tik, tik, tik waktu berdetik
Tak mungkin bisa ku hentikan…
Kamu tak tahu
Rasanya hatiku...
Tik, tik, tik air mataku
Biar terjatuh dalam hati...
Kamu tak bisa
Bayangkan rasanya
Jadi diriku...”

Sebuah Pertanyaan…Kapan Pulang ?

When will you realize that there is at least one person in this world that miss you so much and want to meet you so badly ?

When will you realize that actually there’s a place in this big world you can called it home ?

When will you realize that at least there’s one person in this world wondering where were you ?

When will you realized that there’s at least one person in this world who desperately want to hear your voice ?

Is it too hard to fulfill ?

Some people say that is so much better to leave than being left. I guess that’s definitely right. Coz when you leave, no need for you to wondering when will you going home coz you’re the one who will decide it. But when you being left, you just keep waiting and waiting without knowing when will he/she decide to go home , you just hoping the wind bring him/her home.

I’m sick of waiting you home, so now, I decided to go also, so you couldn’t find me when you home. And so you know, what does it feels to be left up and wondering all day where I might be and hoping that I would home soon.

So later if you come home faster than me, just so you know, this is my revenge to you for leaving me like this.

Anyway,

I miss you still.

marriage minded guys, yes, they're my friends

What’s wrong with men ??? Why they talk too much about marriage these day ??? And I’m not talking about a man, but men. Plural. It means, a lot of man talked about marriage.

Well, at least men around me.

Why guys, why ?? It’s suppose to be women stuff !

I kind of a little bit bored (and large amount of feel so funny about that =p). Come on guys, what happen with you all? You guys suppose to be the one who play around with women, flirt them and make such a fling relationship, you even should make us cry because you didn’t call us after our first date ! So, why I saw a lot of man, talked about some serious relationship we named marriage ??

So here’s the reason why I talk about this marriage thing. I always hang out with these guys in office. Well, one of the guy plan to purpose the woman he dated for 3 years on valentine’s day. As the only woman in that hang out group ( seven, including me ), he asked me a lot. Of course, I helped him as much as I could (well, that’s the greatest thing of having girl as your best friend guys, you just could come to her and asked some advice for your relationship with your girlfriend. Of course, having them as my best friends also gave me a lot of advantages, one of them is I have the access to their hot guy friends =D).

Anyway…back to this guy, so he followed our plan we created about purposing this girl. Well, we helped to set the place also, and I couldn’t believe that the girl refused it !

So we, as usual, hang out together ( seven of us ). I try to lighten him up. Until we took him to the bar, well, maybe have some drink would distracted him even just for a while. I actually didn’t approve it, but those guy said,” Ah, woman, this is how we, guys, handle everything !” I didn’t agree still, but well, it would be great for him if I also be there for him.

But that didn’t stop there. Coz this guy, who, well, I know he’s very sad about the rejection. So he kept talk about marriage.

The day after, and the day after again, and again, and again…

On, and on, and on, and on…

AH BORING !!

And you know what, the other guys also talked about marriage finally, even when we’re not around with this guy ! They talked about how women in this century are very hard to purpose. How we have so much to do list things until 10 years later so we don’t even think about marriage. How we became so much harder to get. Blablabla…

As the only woman in the group, it doesn’t mean that I would stay shut and just listen, NOOOO !!!! So I laughed, and said to them how lame they are !

Of course ! If they just talked about us, and didn’t stop saying all that things which I translate it in my own language as,” why women could be that complicated ?” they will never get any.

I mean, come on, isn’t that the fun thing when men and women been invented for the first time as a different kind of thing ? So we could stay curious one to another. Coz even I hang out with these guy a lot of time, I still don’t understand men that much anyway. And the fact showed how these men never understand woman even they had me around them. Even we ourself don’t understand ourself that much, do we ? So just face it, stay cool. You’ll love the curiousity anyway =)

So my men, please stop this marriage topic kind of thing coz we need to make our sad guy over there to accept the reality and get a life !

Beside, guys, you need to go to work, men…Stop your coffee break and smoke thing, THEN GET BACK TO HERE !!!

Thank you =D

Anyway, sad guy, after all she still love you and you still love him also and you still together even she didn’t accept your purposed, so what ? It’s not the end of the world, is it ? So just wait her for one or two year more or you guys just break up and find another girl who wants to marry you right now. Your’re too good to resist, do you ever realize about that ?

Smile =)

still here

Hi guys !

do you realize that today is a valentine day ?? Oh, yeh, course you do, specially for people who madly in love with someone =p.

anyway,

i'm so madly in such a good mood since i finally quit doing something today which i madly hated ( don't you realize that i use too much 'madly' word, here ? Oh, hell yeah ! ). sometimes when i'm so happy like this there's some piece of my heart who actually afraid that my happiness gonna fly away from me, hahaha. well, yeah, that's me, sometimes i just think about something useless and meaningless like that =p.

thursday i did my project until late in the morning ( yeah, till friday 5 am, i still awake ) and when i did my job and finally thought about have a little sleep, my boss called me at 6 am tell me about a job i should done in office so basically i need to go to the office, ah, crap !! So i did go to office yesterday, and today, on weekend, i have so much work to do which i don't even know how can i finish it on monday...

Wish me luck guys !

And smell you later =)

why ?

Sometimes i feel so cunfuse, why my life could be this hard ? Why can't i just be like anybody who seems like they really easy to get anything they want and specially what they've been dream of ? Yeah, i know, most of them are tried so hard also to get that, but they'll get that yet anyway. Why i can't be like one of them ? I also tried so hard to get those, does my effort isn't hard enough to count ?

Am i don't deserve to anything i want and i dream ?

am i don't eligible enough to get those ?

I'm so exhausted and feel like i want to quit. But if i quit, everything that i've been through will be so useless, and i don't want to let myself to do that.

But...

Oh, i don't even know what i should do right now.

If only i have someone to share with RIGHT NOW and RIGHT BESIDE ME. Not you who far, far, away from me, hikz...

Oh, yes, i'm perfectly human who ever has her time to be sad and feel so down. You can not expect me to always put that smiley face every minutes.

i'm perfectly human...

Please, let me feel this feeling for a while, i promise i'll get better soon.

Smell you later, guys =)


PS:

i kind of trying to improve my english. It's bad, really. But at least i tried !! So from now on, i will only write my blog in english, let me learn it, okay ? So for whoever you are, who doesn't understand english, i pretty much sure that you will understand mine, coz it's a very simple vocabularies i have and i used =D

orang india ituh...

Hai semua !!! Dowh, sudah lama aye ngga nulis blog yah, terakhir kapan yah ? Pas natal, atau tahun baru ?? Hahaha, anyway, maafkahlah daku yang khilaf ini =D

Baru – baru ini gw lagi suka ceting lagi. Padahal udah berapa taun ini emoh banget ceting. Biasanya cuman ceting sama Petr, itu juga urusan nopel. Lama – lama karena gw lagi break panjang yaa ngga gw buka lagi messenger gw. Kadang gw buka, si Petr online. Padahal dia bikin ym cuman gara – gara supaya bisa gampang ceting sama gw. Dia tuh sebenernya punya msn sama icq, cuman karena icq gw ngga kepake dan msn gw ngga punya, ya udah dia bikin YM. Sebenernya bisa aja sih msn dia nge-add ym gw, cuman masalahnya ym gw belom di upgrade, jadi deh dia kudu repot. Yaa... selama dia rela mah ngga pa – pa aja deh. Cuman ngga gw sapa juga biasanya, khususnya ya akhir – akhir ini. Gw bikin invisible biasanya =p. Abisnya Petr tuh kalau gw online, biasa banget deh pertanyaannya,” How’s my favorite writer going ?” Yaa...gitu deh, suka bosen jawabnya =D. Lagian suka kesian juga ngeliat dia sibuk banget di kantornya, dia kan bos perfeksionis, dikit – dikit semua dipikirin dan biasanya langsung emosi naik ke kepala cuman ngga dikeluarin kalau keliatan ngga bisa capai target hariannya. Untung aja dia suka banget olahraga makanya semua emosinya bisa tersalurkan dengan sukses =D. Kadang gw suka geli. Makanya gw suka bilang sama Petr, dia kerja aja dulu, urusan gw mah gampang. Padahal sih klo dia udah kelar kerja gw udah molor =D, beda waktunya kan 6 jam-an, cuman kita tetep sih, komunikasi lewat email. Dowh, kok jadi ngomongin Petr yaa ???

Balik lagi ke kebiasaan baru gw ceting. Ceritanya kan gw gabung di web communitynya si Petr, nah, kebetulan disini ada fasilitas cetingnya. Selama gw gabung, gw ngga pernah gunain ini. Selama ini sih kerjaan gw cuman suka ngeliat – ngeliat profile – profile orang, ngerejek-in tawaran friend request dari orang – orang yang ngga gw kenal atau bahkan mereka ngga pernah kasih comment / message ke profile gw ( dowh, gw suka males sama orang – orang yang maen ngirim friend request padahal nickname dia aja sama sekali ngga gw kenal ! Katakanlah gw pemilih dalam bertemen, cuman cukuplah di Friendster dan Penpal gw berbaik hati selalu meng-approve friend request ini meskipun mereka definitely stranger buat gw =D ), dan yang sering banget gw lakuin yaitu nge-block profile – profile orang yang maen lamar gw aja ( wkwkwkwkwkwkwk, gw rasa mereka udah kehilangan akal =D ). Suatu kali, ada orang India yang lagi online dan ngajakin gw ceting. Sejujurnya, dari pengalaman gw bertaun – taun yang lalu mengenal ceting dari ym, gw paling males yang namanya ceting sama orang Asia Selatan khususnya India & Nepal juga dari benua Afrika khususnya Nigeria. Mereka suka nyeremin gitu sih, ngerayu – rayu najis bikin gw muak dan akhirnya gw block. Makanya gw udah reflek aja mau nge-decline, cuman pas udah mau meng-klik, gw inget. Gw kan belom pernah pake fasilitas ceting disini. Kenapa ngga gw coba aja, cari tau klo disini log on nya sampe berapa menit, jadinya buat bekal gw cetingan sama yang lain disini =D. Ya udahlah, gw approve ajakan tuh orang.

Biasalah gw, ntah kenapa gw tipe ngomong banget. Jadinya pas udah log on ( setelah 30 menit loading, buset deh lama buangged ! ), dia sori - menyori sama gw sebelumnya, karena ternyata koneksinya dia lebih kacrut dari gw. Gw udah log on setengah jam, masih nungguin dia setengah jam lagi, buset deh. Awalnya pertanyaannya basic lah, dia nanya gw kuliah atau kerja. Gw jawab aja somewhere between. Terus dia nanya gw ngapain donk, ya udah gw jelasin tentang kerjaan gw yang berhubungan dengan dunia tulis – menulis ini. Dia terus nanya sama gw interest gw apaan. Sebenernya gw binun, ini interest dalam arti interest, atau gw interest nulis tentang apa. Terus akhirnya mikir, klo soal segala ke-interest-an dari movies, books, tv shows, sampe hobbies, kan udah ada di profile gw. Ya udah gw putusin maksud dia adalah soal tulisan gw. Gw jelasin dah. Abis itu jadi banyak ngomongin tema tulisan gw. Berhubung gw emang agak bawel dan topiknya gw kuasain banget, ya udah sok lah ngobrol.

Semenjak itu gw sama dia udah beberapa kali chat, ngomongin tentang banyak hal. Berhubung gw kan orangnya suka baca banget, jadi gw lumayan tau banyak hal, jadinya semua topik yang dia sodorin, beuh, gw mah expert. Dia nya malah yang suka mati gaya, karena pengetahuannya dia cuman di lapisan atasnya doank, ngga ampe detil. Suka males sebenernya klo ngobrol sama dia, dia tuh bisa ngomong panjang klo udah ngomongin materi S2nya dia, yang emang cuman itu lah yang gw tau lapisan atasannya. Tapi meski begitu, teuteup yah, berhubung gw tuh orang kota yang ternyata jauh lebih modern daripada kehidupannya dia, jadilah dia suka bilang klo ngomong sama gw berasa kya ngomong sama cewe eropa, tauuuuu semua. Yee, situ kali yang kurang gaol =p.

Nah, sejak gw kenal sama dia, gw jadi bisa buktiin omongannya si Trinity yang punya blog naked traveler. Trinity kan bilang di blognya, klo rata – rata orang India tuh lumayan ngga aware sama film luar, karena mereka kan bangga banget sama Bollywood mereka, acha, acha =D. Dan kebukti loh, sama temen gw ini, ngga gaul abis deh dia soal film. Yang dia tau sebatas film kartun, itu juga karena dia ada matkul yang ngebahas soal proses pembuatan film kartun, jadinya tau. Cuman berhubung gw punya temen – temen yang pinter, jadinya semua penjelasan dia udah pernah gw denger juga dari temen – temen gw yang otaknya encer itu. Temen India gw ini sampe heran, dia bilang orang Indo tuh pinter – pinter yah, hahaha. Orang lo juga kali, cuman lo nya aja yang ngga begaul =p.

Satu lagi keluhan gw sebenernya. Tapi klo yang ini gw ngga tau deh berlaku umum atau emang cuman dia doank yang begini. Bahasa inggrisnya itu loh, hadoh !! Mahasiswa S2, cuman ngga ngerti percakapan. Maksud gw, klo menurut dia bahasa inggris gw yang ngga oke, gw heran deh kenapa gw sama Petr selama ini go a long aja. Belum lagi sahabat pena gw yang orang Swedia, Belanda dan Jerman. Gw udah sahabatan sama mereka lama banget, ngga pernah salah ngerti klo ngomong. Baik pihak dia atau pihak gw ( tapi dari mereka, si Swedia paling lekker lah bahasa inggrisnya, ngga bercacat, perfecto abis ! ). Belum lagi gw punya dua sepupu dan om yang native orang Australi, selama bertahun – tahun sejak tante gw married sama om native gw ini dan akhirnya punya anak – anak sampe udah pada abg begini, mereka selalu bilang bahasa inggris gw bagus. Kan lucu, kenapa pas sama si India ini jadi ada masalah dalam bahasa inggris gw ?? Gw ngomong apa dia ngartiinnya apa. Terus dia tuh suka menerapkan komunikasi tuh, semua – muanya grammarnya simple. Maksud gw, klo past yah yang simple, klo future yah yang simple, klo present juga yang simple. Dia kyanya ngga mengenal klo imbuhan di-, itu tuh klo dibahasa inggrisin pake –ed juga, kya past tense. Jadinya gw suka bingung sama omongannya dia. Pernah dia ngajarin gw bilang gini,” liat donk ada -ed dibelakangnya, itu berarti past tense.”. Wkwkwkwkwkwk !!!Yeh, klo ngomongin soal grammar mah, dia tuh salah banget bikin kalimatnya. Harusnya kan itu perfect past tense, pake had been, bukan cuman ditambahain –ed di verb, ya Allah ! Cuman gw males manjangin masalah, gw bilang aja,” ok, you meant past tense, go on then.” Eh dia malah ngomel – ngomel katanya kebiasaan gw deh, mengakhiri argue dengan begitu, kan jadinya gw yang menang bukan dia. Lah ?? Gimana seeh, dikasih kemenangan ngga rela, di kasih tuin dia ngga ngerti, aneh banget. Udah gitu gw ngga merasa lagi arguing sama dia =p, orang yang aneh…

Pokoe, omongannya Trinity semua kebukti bener deh. Hebat deh si Trinity bisa ngamatin objek sampe begitunya =D

Bravo trinity !!

si Blair di Gossip Girl

Pernah atau suka nonton Gossip Girl ?

Gw sejujurnya ngga terlalu suka. Suka ngga manusiawi soalnya. Maksud gw, dunianya terlalu kejam buat gw yang bukan siapa - siapa. Serem aja kalau gw misalnya menjadi salah satu korban dari tuh anak - anak orang kaya yang rata - rata cuman berlindung dibalik nama besar orangtuanya yang pada umumnya dapetin semua kekayaan mereka dengan usaha keras. Ironis aja menurut gw ngeliat betapa anak - anak bisa segitu kejamnya, padahal, siapa tau dimasa mudanya tuh orangtua mereka, mereka adalah salah satu anak biasa - biasa aja atau berasal dari kelas bawah yang diinjek - injek sama orang kaya, temen mereka yang gracefully punya ortu yang tajir.

Anyway, gw bukan ngomongin masalah sosial new yorker sih...

Yang gw liat disini adalah si Blair. Dari semua karakter yang ada di Gossip Girl, gw paling keseian sama dia. Begitu palsu dan rapuh. Betapa satu serangan kecil aja bisa membuat dia terluka. Yang ini nih, baru drama queen menurut gw. Kalau serena sih, cuman camera spot ajah, drama queennya tetep si Blair.

Sampai ketika di perang yang kesekian antar sahabat yaitu si Blair dan Serena, akhirnya Blair bilang sama Serena, satu kejujuran tentang perasaannya yang keluar dari mulutnya yang jarang banget terjadi.

" I'm sick of standing beside some glowing sunshine barbie."

( kalau ngga salah begitu deh kira - kira )

Terus dia diem sebentar dan bilang :

" Life is too short and you make it long."

( klo yang ini beneran persis begitu kalimatnya )

Blair bukan tipe yang bakal jujur sama sahabatnya kya Serena. Blair, seperti warna rambutnya yang gelap, adalah pribadi yang tertutup yang begitu takut kalau isi hatinya ketauan sama orang. Dia sangat tidak mudah percaya sama orang, ngga kya Serena.

Seperti cewe - cewe pada umumnya yang hampir selalu melibatkan emosi pas nonton apapun, emosi gw juga terlibat disini. Awalnya gw ngga suka banget sama Blair, she's way too manipulative for her age. Dan gw kesian ngeliat Serena dan cewe - cewe lain yang suka jadi kekejaman si Blair.

Tapi semakin kesini, gw semakin bisa mengerti Blair. I mean, come on. Serena almost have everything in her life. She has a good boyfriend, friendly brother and mom, pretty face and kind of humourist girl ever, what else she could ask for ?

Tapi Blair ? Bokapnya ninggalin dia dan nyokapnya untuk cowo lain, nyokapnya tenggelam dalam pekerjaannya, sahabatnya pergi ngga bilang - bilang, pacarnya ternyata mengkhianati dia dengan sahabatnya sendiri itu, dan dia ngga punya true friend. Gw rasa kekayaan dan hobinya menindas adalah topengnya dia menutupi semua rasa kekecewaannya.

Oh great, gw terikat terlalu dalam dengan serial ini =p

Anyway, gw tau gimana rasanya berada di posisi blair. Emang sih, gw ngga tajir, apalagi sampe kya dia. Tapi gw tau, gimana rasanya jadi dia =D

aku ngga ngerti

hahaha, gw peratiin di pesbuknya temen - temen gw intinya mereka lagi pada piling so blu semua ( inggrisnya kaco abis =p ). Apa emang perasaan ini yang sedang terjadi diangkatan gw yah ( cieh ilah ! )? Tau deh =D

Anyway, maren, bukan hari yang keren buat gw, kya orang - orang pada umumnya, karena kemaren, pas malam taun baruan sih tepatnya, GW MALAH KETIDURAN !!

Anjrit, asli tolol banget =D

tapi ya udahlah =D

Kemaren pas tanggal satu-nya, jalan gitu sama Mario, sahabat gw. Tadinya gw ngajakin dia bikin resolusi tahun 2009 ( tsah ! berat...), cuman akhirnya kita malah ngga jadi bikin gitu, biznya kata tuh anak tiap kali dia diajakin atau disuruh bikin itu, rasanya langsung gimana gitu. Blank mungkin. Atau mungkin jadi berasa dikejar - kejar target yah ? Ntahlah, hanya dia yang tau apa sebenernya masalahnya dengan resolusi. Mungkin cape berkomitmen kya gw ? Hehehe...Mungkin...You answer the question lah mar =D. Cuman, kita jadinya malah ngomongin nopel gw,dan...

rumah masa depan kita !!!

hahahahahaha....

Ngomong - ngomong soal nopel gw, iya nih, gw bakal kelarin editannya Last Goodbye, bakal kelarin tambahan - tambahannya Kau Dimana, dan bakal selesein Tentang Dia. Jadinya ntar ke-3 nopel itu bakal bareng gw kasih ke Gagas. Masa sih, dari tiga nopel itu ngga ada yang goal juga ???

Jadi resolusi tahun 2009 gw, ngga usah muluk - muluk apalagi kebanyakan, cuman satu :

" Novel gw diterbitin !!!"

Yes, pasti bisa !!

Doakan aku yah temans =D